Looking Back at My Sweet P

So I noticed that along the side of my blog, there's a top 5 list of posts.

I also noticed that 2 of these posts refer to being pregnant with P. One of which I read and it made me laugh- because knowing her as I do now, I can see how those initial interactions with her was part of her personality.

Here's the then and now of it:

THEN:

When someone is talking in a mean 

tone, or loudly, or maybe Spud just doesn't like them, 

Spud hides under my right rib. Whole body.

 It's fun to feel Spud fold up on one side.

NOW:

Yup. P is not a fan of loud noises and yelling or when certain people talk. While she no longer folds up under a rib, her eyes get really big and she runs to me or dad. It's funny.


THEN:
Movement: Lots. I can tell when it's a hand wave, a kick, or when 

Spud pedals along my stomach.

NOW:
The key here is the "pedals along my stomach". When P gets excited, she does something we like to call 'happy feet'. It's like a little baby tap dance or an in-place run. Also humorous. Apparently she's been doing it for a long time.


This makes me glad I took the advice of my awesome Sister in Law(s). I think I'll record this again- in a few weeks.

1,000 Mental Blogs

Friends, I always have blogs that I want to write, but I never seem to have the moment of peace to write them. Well, I am taking a moment now to write one of them about Education...

The town I live has a reputation of having bad schools.

I have subbed at every school in the district and I now deal with some misbehaving young people in my job and here is my opinion about my "bad school district".

Is there room for improvement? Yes.

Are there some bad teachers? Yes.

What is the heart and core of our "bad" schools?

Honestly? Parents who check out of their kids lives. All the elementary schools are pretty great- with a few average ones in poor areas.

The Middle School? It is awesome. The principal is a great leader and cares about the kids. He gives them the 'tough love' attitude that they need.

But it's like these kids hit high school and parents check out of their lives. That is why our high school is not very good. Because there aren't good parents that are pushing their kids to get good grades. Families are not being families. You know, doing stuff together. It's like the parents toss their 15-18 yr olds over to their friends and then shrug their shoulders when their kids do not succeed.


Often people ask if I will put my kids in public or private. I say public. They always follow up with how bad the schools are in SM. I can't help but roll my eyes and say, Well it's an education. Something I can get involved in and influence to make sure it works. It is not uncontrollable. Parents just need to put the time in to make our schools great.

Back Again

Blogging seems to be an ebb and flow for me. A series of starts and stops.

Here I start again.

I guess I'll start with this.

Parenting.

Fatherhood.

I get a large look at society in my what I do everyday. I have one consistent question.

Where are the parents?

More particularly, where are the fathers?

As I've ventured into parenthood with Russ, I am so grateful he's by my side and not someone else. I've tried to describe our parenting style and I think I can explain it as this: co-parenting.

Most of you may thing- is there any other form?

Well. I think a lot of the time one parent is dominant. Moms tend to be primary caregivers, to be honest.

But it seems with Russ and I we are 50/50. He gets Phoenix ready in the morning and takes her to school. I pick her up and get her ready for bed. Together we read her bedtime stories. 

I do her laundry and clean her room.

Russ goes to the Parent-Teacher Org. meetings and washes he food bottles.

This blog is really more of a free-flow of thought.

but our society needs more parents. More fathers.

Children do not need more friends. They need more direction.

I heard it this way recently- Children need a backbone, not a wishbone.

I think this is why I have come to loathe tv shows like Glee and the like. It turns kids into dreamers instead of workers. Kids today focus so much on developing a personalilty and becoming a unique butterfly that they don't work or learn.

well guess what? Often, it is while you are doing and working you develop who you are. 

Ok, this is turning into a rant. A slightly angry rant! It's time I back off and go run errands.

until next time!

Phoenix goes to law school...

Russ can't always watch Phoenix.

So sometimes she comes to class with me.

I can't wait for her to apply to Baylor Law and say:

"I attended my first class at Baylor Law when I was just one month old..."

3 months of a Princess

Yesterday Phoe hit the 3-month mark of having this sweet girl in our life.

It has been a lot of fun- and I know it will only get better.

New developments this past week:

• Smiling for long periods of time
• Grabbing and pinching at things
• Crying better
• Pushing up on her forearms.

On the other hand, Phoenix has quit rolling over. I guess she forgot how to do it. She also is back to sleeping 20 or so hours a day. So I guess she must be growing!

Baby Weight: Plans for Losing It

Perhaps this blog is premature, because I can't say that I've succeeded at my plan. But maybe someday I can tell you if this worked or not.

Baby weight. Most moms of a newborn is trying to lose it. Yes, I've met a few women who want to keep it- but they were wiry to start with.

I've heard a lot of advice for how to make it work. I've seen a lot of moms that at my point (10 wks post-delivery) that have done it. But I've done things a bit differently.

What happened:
Phoenix was in the NICU for her first 9 days of life. This was VERY stressful and any attempt to watch what I ate went out the window. I lived on fast food and Dr. Pepper. I did my best to stay up as much as I could with her.

When Phoe came home, I did do a few yoga sessions and go on walks. But I did not have a consistent exercise routine. Further, I had bought tons of treats to make Christmas cookies before being 'surprised' by Phoenix's early arrival. So when I got home, my mom began making those delicious cookies. While I tried to deliver those cookies to others, most ended up in my belly.

Then I had law school finals. That's a whole other wave of stress. Not only stress, but long hours of studying without working out.

How my body handled it:
At first I dropped a lot of weight. But as I ate those cookies and spent a lot of time studying, the weight came back very easily. * Although I don't really regret it, I think this is what caused Phoenix to bulk up as fast as she has.

The Plan:
Now that finals are done and I'm getting into a rhythm, I'm trying to get back in shape and be more active. I've contemplated what I want to do the past few weeks and here is what I'm doing:

• Accountability: Every time I go to the gym, I check-in on FB. Some may find it annoying, but it is my way of acknowledging I am doing something.

• Once a Day: I like to get in a good hour workout. But that can't always happen with a newborn. So I've learned to take what I can get. 
• Today for example. Phoenix blew out her diaper (peed all over her dad) and I couldn't leave for the gym when I planned. When I finally got to the gym, the child-care center was only open for 40 minutes. So I ran for 30 minutes straight, got the best workout I could, and went home. In a way this is a positive- because it forced me to get a good workout done. And it's the first time since getting pregnant that I ran for 30 minutes straight. In a way, not having a lot of time is a good thing!

• Default Exercise: I would love to be in a spin class and an ab class everyday- or every other day. But truth is, I can't. And I don't always have time to make up a workout. So, I have my default workout: Running a 5k. When I can't plan, I just run a 5k- and I try to do a little better than the last time I ran it.

• Utilize Resources: Russ is a wonderful husband for this. He is very willing to compromise and watch Phoenix so I can go work out. There's been a few times where Russ wants to run to the store and I want to work out. Instead of taking 2 cars, or rotating our time in doing what we want, Russ will drive and drop me at the gym and I'll work out. If there is a bunch of kids in the child-care place, he takes Phoe with him to the store. If there are only a few kids in child-care at the gym, Phoe comes with me. Really, it's a huge help to make sure I get in my gym time.

• Back-Up: Sometimes making it to the gym is just not possible. So I try to have a workout at home. Pinterest is great for having workout lists. 25 jumping jacks, 100 crunches, etc. I've pinned some of these so I can do one real quick on days the gym is not an option.
• Another back-up I've used is running a trail near where I live. I've previously tracked the distance and I know it's the distance of a 5k. Sometimes I've used this to work out.

That's about it for my plan. Any suggestions?

And- I realize I've said nothing about food. I'm off soda for Lent, but other than that I haven't done much to alter my intake. I'm still getting over my sugar love that started after having Phoenix. (When I was pregnant, I couldn't stand sugar. Now that I'm not pregnant anymore, I've gone the other way to loving sugar.)

More to come, I'm sure! I'll at least update in a few months to say if this has worked or not.

2 weeks old... 2 weeks until her due date

Today my little princess is 2 weeks old. She came so quickly that her parents are still playing catch-up.

Today we put the crib together.

Today we did our own laundry for the first time since early December. (ew...)

Today my house actually looks like it might be ready for a baby to come... in 2 weeks, when she was supposed to come.

But even though we are playing catch-up, we are trying to not miss the moments with our princess. I felt a little guilty about this, and mentioned this to my mom. I mean, we've had people bring meals in for the past little bit, and I feel bad because I'm not bed ridden or anything- I'm just trying to play catch-up with getting ready for Phoenix all while trying not to miss spending time with her.

My mom, who is so wise, shared this poem with me:

BABIES

Cleaning and cooking can wait 'till tomorrow

For babies grow up, as we've learned to our sorrow.

So quiet down cobwebs, dust go to sleep,

I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.

I don't feel one bit bad for having a messy house or asking for help with meals after reading that. 

The life of a NICU parent

This is a NICU parent.

So is this.

Here are a few thoughts I have on being a NICU parent:

• Spend every moment you can with your baby.
• Sleep when your body makes you sleep.
• Go home to sleep and end up crying for an hour about the little one you left at the hospital.
• You meet a stranger while washing your hands to see your baby. You don't make small talk. You ask, "How early was yours born?" or "What's your baby in for?"
• Ask the nurses every question you can think of. But really, you have no idea what's going on.
• Sleep in the waiting room (Yes, I've slept on that couch where the man in the first picture is sleeping).
• Sleep when you hold your baby (until the nurse comes in).
• Sleep when they close the NICU for 1 hr and a half.
• Sleep in the McDonald charity room while a family of 10 wait in there with you.
• Sleep when you wait for food to come at a restaurant.
• Put up with any sort of restrictions you get put on you, like this:

Yes, Phoenix is in isolation. We must mask, gown, and glove before we see her. 

We can't go anywhere else in the NICU.

But there's really no complaint to be given. 

Because this is worth it:

And because your baby is not the baby that was born at 23 weeks and is in the corner fighting for their life.

And your baby is not the baby that's been in the NICU for 5 weeks.

And your baby is not taking major step backwards, like suddenly developing a diaphragm problem the day they're supposed to go home.

And you don't have other kids at home that you have to divide your time between- your newborn and your other kiddos.

But really.

This is worth it.