Memorial Day

It was a week ago, I know, but better late than never, right?

I woke up on Memorial Day feeling like I should feel grateful for those who have sacrificed their life, if not in the ultimate way it could be sacrificed, then by giving up some of the best years of their life. But I didn't feel very grateful. Because all I could think of it this:

I had a hard time feeling grateful for those who have given the best years of their lives, so people like these two could squander their own lives and promote ignorance of the best years of the live of many young people.

I felt very bad about not feeling grateful. I felt very upset that people like the above are now the face of America. Sure it was funny at first, but the joke is old. The celebrity of ignorance, money, and over the top everything needs to stop. The purpose of life is a lot more subtle, intelligent, and pure.

And I'm not just saying that. On Memorial Day I got out of bed. I went about my day working on the house, taking care of friends, and being taken care of by my friends. About a year and a half ago I started a project on our house that never was finished. It was too big of a job for me. So my friends and my husband- my very amazing friends and my very amazing husband, gave up their day off to finish this project:

I wish I had a picture of the final project, but they're still finishing up one side. That'll be in a future post. Plus, I won't be back in San Marcos for a few weeks. So even if it is done, I'm not there to snag a photo of it.

Anyway, I started to feel grateful for those who had given up their time to help.

While the boys worked on this project, I went to brunch with other friends (Heidi, Teresa, and Jess). Again I felt grateful for the chance we had to be together and enjoy some grub.

I felt grateful for our freedom to peacefully assemble.

Later I took Heidi and Jess to my favorite gas station. Again, grateful for the freedom to travel... and to hold hands with the Bucce's beaver without judgment.

I Love Bucce's

By the time I went back to bed that night, I felt very grateful. I included in my prayers that night a prayer of gratitude for those that served and those I knew personally who had served. Let me thank them again right now:

Thank you Daniel

Thank you Jill

Thank you Aaron!!!

Thank you Will (and Will's wife)
Aren't they cute???

Thanks Josh!

Thank you Chris.

And thank you to the many others who have served or are currently serving!

Thank you to my Great Uncle David for giving his life so other soldiers he was serving with could live!

Accepted

Texas from the Amtrak ride I took earlier this month.

I had a conversation today with a man from my law school class. As I talked with him, I learned that life had been hard for him. Many parts of life had left him rejected. He had not found success in some areas of life that are most basic to happiness; family, work, and religion.

Part of my heart broke for him. Because I've watch my classmates be dismissive of him the past few months. Today was my first real interaction with him. We were working on a school project together. I never realized that there was so much silent sorrow from someone right in my class.  I don't think I made his life any easier. But I listened. And it made me realize something. Nothing fantastic. Something I have thought and felt before. I guess I should say it reminded me of something.

Sometimes we get so caught up in our own happiness and survival that we forget to look around for others who might be drowning. Who may be worse off than us. Or maybe who are doing the same as us, but don't have the support structure that we may have. We get caught up and find ourselves saying things like:

• "I feel bad for people who aren't as happy as I am"
• "Those poor people on the planet who will never know how good life is. Sucks for them. Sure makes me grateful I'm not one of them. I'm so glad that's not me."

Or, if they're similarly situated as we are:

• "They should've done that differently. Yup, I see them struggling but they wouldn't struggle if they would do it my way."
• "Wow, they're having a hard time. But so am I. And they should really be the one to make efforts to help me out in this hard time."

And I guess these thoughts could fall under either category:

• "Huh. They're struggling. Well, that's messy. I don't want to get involved. I'll just come around afterwards and show them I care."
• "Well... I don't really approve of how they're handling things. I would do things differently so that means I can't help."

Now, I think I'm guilty of this too. I've been in this Practice Court program for just as long as these students who have been cruel to this man. I've heard of my classmate's tragedies and felt indifferent. Or I've ignored their problems. But this is not right. I am wrong. Those people that were this man's friends? They were wrong.

Do you see how much all those statements focus on ME?

It should go the other way around. It should be about them. Regardless of our opinions on how they handle their problems. And I don't think it takes much. 5 minutes to listen. A hug. Baking cookies with a friend, maybe. But not much.

But it makes the world of difference. I saw it in this man as he walked away this afternoon, after we'd talked for 5 minutes. I noticed he had his bounce back in his walk. I noticed that I felt better. As though somehow our 5 minute conversation had lessened the load of reading I have to do tonight.

All we want in this world, as least from each other, is acceptance. And when we listen and serve, we accept one another. I hope I remember this. So the next time I get the opportunity to judge and walk away that I choose to stay, take 5 minutes, and help in some small way.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

If you want to read more about this, Here's a talk that also came to mind for me:

Gifts of Love- Elder Eyring

I love the story of the jar of cherries.

Veteran's Day!

Thank you to my Grandparents for fighting in World War II in the Canadian Armed Forces. For my Grandma Milner becoming a Dame in the Canadian Legion.

Thank you to my American Grandparents for serving on the US side (including my grandma painting airplanes!) during WWII.

Thank you to my Uncle David for saving the lives of everyone on his plane. For giving away his parachute to a man with a wife and kids, and then going down with the airplane in India. This was also in World War II. There are 60+ descendants in my family named "David" after this heroic man. Including my little brother David and my 2nd cousin D. Todd Christofferson.

Thank you to my cousin Aaron for serving multiple tours of duty in the Middle East. He was the sharp shooter on top of the tank and saved many lives by taking out enemies before they took out his 'men' and his tank.

Thank you to my friends:

Greg Stell (currently serving in the Middle East. His wife and two sons are at home sacrificing their family time. Thank you Janessa.)

Daniel Tucker (Air Force)

Mark Walraven (Law student classmate. Amazing person.)

Jill Shepherd (Medic and Miss Utah 2008!)

Verna Milner (Army. Never active duty. But had the courage to serve!)

Jeremy Schroeder (Trained in San Antonio. We spent the 4th of July with him)

Chris Crawford (Undergrad Study Buddy. Served multiple tours of duty overseas and still serving our country working for the Ambassador in East Dili Timor. Thank you to his adorable wife Kelly and their 3 boys!)

I doubt any of these folks read my blog. But I wanted to remember who they were and what they've sacrificed for me. Thank You. To those I know and those I don't. Thank You for defending my freedom to go to law school, watch stupid movies, and eat oreos. But mostly my freedom to enjoy my family.

The New 'Pay It Forward'

Lucky you! The first five people to respond to this post will get something made by me! My choice. For you. This offer does have some restrictions and limitations:

1. I make no guarantees that you will like what I make!
2. What I create will be just for you.
3. It'll be done this year. {might be a little while}
4. You will have no clue what it's going to be. It may be a story. It may be poetry or maybe even some creation I haven't even invented yet (but Heaven knows it will most likely be totally fabulous and creative... :). I may draw or paint something. I may bake you something and mail it to you. Who knows? Not you, that's for sure!
5. I reserve the right to do something extremely strange.

The catch? Oh, the catch is that you must re-post this on your blog and offer the same to the first 5 people who do the same on your blog.